Vacker
by keephie-13
Summary: Fitz feels the pressure of the Vacker legacy. Will he be good enough to uphold it? Rated T for dark themes/mentions of suicide/self-harm. One-shot.


Fitz did everything in his power to be perfect. As perfect as his father.

This was because Fitz had a legacy to uphold. And not just any legacy. The Vacker legacy.

Being a Vacker was great. Fitz got to go on important missions with his dad, like finding Sophie. He got to know what it was like to be an Emissary ahead of time, since his dad was only one of the Council's most important Emissaries. Being a Vacker meant he was one of the world's best Telepaths and one of the youngest to manifest. It meant he was practically elvin royalty. He got fancy clothes and a mansion for a house and everyone loved him, everyone wanted to be his friend. He truly was the Golden Boy.

But sometimes being a Vacker was hard. Sometimes it meant he had to act more golden than he really was. Sometimes, when it was late at night and he couldn't sleep, he cried to himself. But those were the only times he let himself cry. The only times he let himself break. During the day, he acted like the perfect child he was. He acted smart, strong, powerful, ready to follow in his father's footsteps and save the elvin world.

Fitz didn't really get a choice in career. Technically, he _could_ choose to be something other than an Emissary, but he loved his parents and he didn't think he could bear the weight of disappointing them. They had already suffered enough through losing their oldest son Alvar when he joined the Neverseen, and it had affected them. Like Fitz, they tried not to show their emotions, but after years of hiding himself, Fitz had learned to recognize when something was amiss. Now the Vacker legacy was entirely Fitz's. He may not have liked having an older brother who constantly teased him, but at least it meant there was someone else, that not all the pressure was on him.

And sometimes, Fitz got sick of all the people fawning over him. People liking him because he was a nice person, the way Sophie and Keefe and the others did, was one thing, but most people who liked him liked him only because of his name. _Vacker_. Fitzroy Avery Vacker.

There were times when Fitz felt he could never be as good as his father. There were times when he wondered if there was even a point in trying. Every time he messed up, every time he placed a foot out of line, the weight of his parents' disappointment bore down on him. Even Fitz, a Vacker, had scars. Mental scars, but physical ones, too. From all the times he'd cut his own flesh because he felt it was the only way to release his emotions.

Once, Fitz had nearly given up. It was because of another stupid mistake. A failed assignment. Elves were supposed to be too perfect to make mistakes. _Vackers_ were supposed to be too perfect to make mistakes. Yet Fitz had failed. Again. Thoughts of suicide entered his mind. He could end it all. He could succumb to the numbness, never have to worry again about upholding some stupid legacy and pleasing his parents with their overly high expectations. But there was someone else, someone he had to live for. His little sister. Biana.

Just like how all the pressure was put on Fitz when Alvar left, Fitz knew Biana would have to carry that same pressure if he chose to commit suicide. And no matter how much he was struggling, he couldn't do that to his sister. They had grown up together. They loved each other. Fitz had always felt a brotherly urge to protect her, and if it meant sacrificing his own happiness for hers, so be it. He would do it.

He would do it over and over again for Biana.

He would stay alive.

Eventually, as Fitz grew older and more mature, he came to realize that his parents didn't expect him to be perfect. They didn't want him to be perfect. They just wanted him to try his best and become the best person he could. That was what the Vacker legacy was about. Not being perfect. Not being the most popular, or the richest, or even the smartest. It was about doing what you wanted with your life, and making the world better in your own small ways.

Fitz completed his elite levels at Foxfire. He did get a job as an Emissary, despite his earlier aversions to it. And he enjoyed it. When he worked, he felt like he was upholding the Vacker legacy. Even though he wasn't perfect. Far from it, in fact. But Fitz did good for the elvin world. One of the things he was best known for was amending the Matchmaking system, making it so that there were no Bad Matches, and he helped ensure that same-sex marriages were accepted in the elvin community. He served as best man at Keefe and Tam's wedding, and later married Sophie Foster.

Biana grew up too, and eventually married Dex Dizznee. She never lost contact with Fitz, and although Biana never realized it, Fitz would always remember how she had saved him when he was going through tough times. Now, Fitz was glad he had chosen to live. He was glad he had chosen not to commit suicide, and it was all thanks to Biana. She was a true Vacker, too, for although she never became an Emissary or a Councillor or a member of the nobility she was always the kindest person Fitz knew, and he enjoyed his frequent visits with her.

When Fitz finally retired from his post as Emissary, he knew he had done well and that his parents were proud of him. He had upheld the Vacker legacy after all.

 **A/N: Yes, I am a SoKeefe shipper, but for the purposes of this story, I had Sophie marry Fitz. I haven't had much experience writing stuff like this before, the idea just came into my mind, so please review! I really appreciate all feedback and constructive criticism! Thanks!**


End file.
